The athlete writing is coached by Ironmate, Mark Kleanthous

 Well this blog has been a long time coming now and I've been eager to write up my day with my new coach Mark Kleanthous. For some who may have been waiting for some secrets from such an experienced Ironman and coach I'm not going to reveal them, not them all anyway (we would be here all day). I may not be at a high level on the athlete scale but I still have competition in what I aim to achieve so need to keep them as my personal gains over others. Furthermore, what Mark tells me is personal to me as an individual and as an athlete. My training plans and tips are personal to my ability and my goals, so someone else may not even benefit from them. That said I'm sure there are some things many would benefit from, but that is the joy of having a coach, particularly one so experienced. I also don't think Mark would be too pleased with me if I went around shouting his tips from the rooftops. However, I'm sure there is some things you can take from this blog as this is the real start on my journey to Kona.
 Well I met Mark on Friday (24th). The night before I went swimming at the outdoor pool straight from work, again with no wetsuit (it was bloody freezing that night). However, despite my reluctance when I arrived due to being shattered I thoroughly enjoyed my swim. My new technique change had meant I didn't struggle as much as I usually did. The week before I struggled to even keep up, just lagging at the back (I always found the open water pool harder to swim in, as if I was swimming in lead). But that night I managed to keep the pace and was on the toes of the woman I couldn't keep up with last week. There were 4 of us in the lane but only me and another alternating which made it an even tougher session which in the end made it even more satisfying. It is so exciting seeing my swim improving - so much so I have now bought some more training aids. I bought some paddles that I put on my hands which makes emphases how to enter the water and how to pull through the water. I also finally invested in some flippers. I know my kick is strong, when doing drills I am able to sometimes catch people who have flippers on even when I do not have them on. However, when I try and combine this with full stroke I lose it (so much for women being able to multi-task). I also know many say that triathletes do not need to focus on the kick when in the swim so to preserve the legs for the cycle and run - but I'm trying to get to another level of athlete now. I'm hoping with the flippers and the notion of using them will make it natural for me to be able to kick hard when doing full stroke. Anyway, after another hard and motivating swim session that week it was straight to bed ready for an early turbo session with Jane before driving to see Mark.
 The two hour turbo session Jane and I did on Friday morning was hell but all the same a relief when it was over. Due to my increased activity on various bikes I had a serious case of saddle soreness which felt like a monstrous bruise all around my sensitive areas so not only was I physically done in my derriere was feeling rather sorry for itself too. However, there was no rest for the wicked and after a quick change and deodorant spray I was on the way to Milton Keynes to meet Mark. I ate some pasta I had made as some fuel for the hours ahead.
 The day with Mark was more of an analysis of me, my technique and ability. Mark knew my time splits from Wales so can analyse me that way but there is nothing better than seeing the real thing and finding out technically where the results and gains can be made. Our first official meet began with a loud and welcoming Hello, hug and kiss on the cheek. I knew from this moment I had made the right decision in my coach. I also met Mark's wife, Clare which was also lovely. After our greetings it was time to pay attention - I was told that when one guy met Mark for the first time he counted 75 new things he learned! First thing we did was get my embarrassingly dirty bike oiled up. After that it was out for a steady 12 mile ride to assess my cycling style. Within the first 5 minutes I was learning. I wasn't saying a lot (as Mark will agree with) but I was just listening, grunting that I acknowledged what I was hearing, taking it in and then trying to put it into affect. I learnt to ankle roll, attempted to take water and fuel the 'proper' and efficient way and concentrated on focussing my energy through the legs. I also found a new position to hold myself on the bike to make it more comfortable and aero when on long rides (especially as I don't have tri bars).

Mark showing his multi-skilling by riding and taking a picture

These are just a few of the many things did in that 45 minutes that seemed to fly by. However, the most important change I learnt was pretty basic - the technique of how I ride. I found that that 'elusive' and what I used to consider pro athlete technical term, cadence, is not so scary and this is what I need to improve on more than anything. I normally ride my bike with the gears high as if I am doing a strengthening session all the time as I associated feeling the resistance as the productive way to ride. However, what I need to be doing is lowering the gears and increasing the cadence (the number of revolutions of the crank per minute). It is a basic change which will make me more efficient and not sap my energy. I liked to feel the bite in resistance, comparing being out on the road to being in a spin bike session. This comparison is also evident when I stand up when cycling uphill. Dan had told me this before but I cycle standing up as if I am hovering which if you have ever tried it is a killer on the thighs. Again, this is great for strengthening but not for speed. On top of that there is still a lot of work to be done to make me gain more confidence on the bike in general, especially as I still am not confident going downhill something I definitely need to work on for the descents in Lanzarote. However, although I have made this to sound like everything was wrong, I did do a lot right and Mark reassured me that he has seen worse and I did really well. I look comfortable on the bike and am prepared to change, listen and adapt. Also on another positive note, as there is a lot to work on it means there is more to improve on which means more time cut off. There were other suggestions such as getting some tri bars to cut off some extra time off when in Lanzarote and getting a better saddle to improve my positioning and comfort on the bike. I also decided I wanted to get new pedals on my bike as although I got new ones when getting my bike in July I am not as happy with them as I was my previous brand 'Time'. Unfortunately pedals, a good saddle and lightweight tri bars are not as cheap as swim paddles and flippers (they came to the grand total of £20) but it'll have to come in time.

The athlete in front is coached by Ironmate Mark

 So after the bike it was time to assess my run. I was really worried about this. My run is my weakest discipline and as I have never considered myself a runner (despite the numerous run achievements) and thought I lacked the technique that would make me a runner. Mark almost instantly reassured me about my run technique, saying I was light on my feet which meant that there was little friction between me and the ground (something Mark says has taken him 30 years to perfect). I have tried hard in the last year to make myself roll from ankle to toe as opposed to landing flat footed and this was a sure sign of my progress so I was happy with myself. (If i had still be landing with a flat feet it would've sounded like elephants had arrived). I was also told I had a technique that is ready for the 'Ironman shuffle'. This is basically small steps, not strides, but at a high cadence (that word again) and this is the main thing I need to aim towards on my run. I have never had a big run stride and it put me at ease that I didn't need to try and make myself have one. Mark also explained some other techniques I should take on board relating to how my arms should be used as a power weapon but not remain too rigid or to swing around my body and explaining the consequences of doing such things. (I tried all these new lessons out the day after at a tough 10k Chiltern Tri hill rep run session).

 Mark also assessed the biomechanics of my run style by getting me to run along the white lines in the middle of the road. He did notice that my left knee swings out but I explained I think this is a technique I have adapted myself in order to try and avoid my ITB injury recurring. The logic was to land further to the outside of my foot so that my foot could not over-pronate inwards as I do not want let my knee to bend inwards. However, it although not ideal biomechanically it does not pose any real issue and if it is a mechanism to stop me from getting injured it cannot be a bad thing.
 After our 2 mile run we then sat and spoke about my events, aims, goals, nutrition and general Ironman and triathlon chit chat for hours. In there you can imagine I got plenty of other tips so if you think I gave away some personal tips in this blog then I can assure you don't even know the half of it! I even got an Ironmate hat and keyring and was officially welcomed into Ironmate coaching.
 Mark also wanted to take a picture of me with his book which has now made it to the third edition (I better get mine signed now!). Mark is so enthusiastic and dedicated in seeing me personally succeed and understands the reasonings as to why I want to achieve them. He also believes in me and after a tough few weeks feeling increasingly insecure and daunted of what I have set out to achieve I feel such a huge sense of relief that a professional believes I am not being stupid and can make it. What is even more satisfying is he thinks I can qualify this year in Wales!

Mark's triathlon book - which has sold to the thousands

 I left feeling enthusiastic and excited for my new partnership with Mark. I couldn't be happier to have such a knowledgable, understanding and enthusiastic coach by my side. Here is to 2014! I'm so thankful already. I'm excited about the next journey in my life and I finally truly believe in myself that I can make it, so bring it on! #Hollie4Kona!

Slightly close especially after 4 hours of exercise but my new hat which I wore on my run the following morning

My birthday swim success

 Well my last blog was upbeat, motivational and probably the happiest one I have written in months. However, without dwelling on my grief too much I did have a crash on the Saturday night (18th). I'm not moaning as I know full well the challenge I have taken on but I had been working a lot doing every day of overtime that was offered to me as well as keeping up with my new training plan - getting me up at 4am some days and not getting me home until 11pm. I was exhausted and I just felt deflated. Dan has also been working all hours of the day recently so I was alone. I had some wine and got emotional, getting angry and sad thinking about the unfairness of losing Rose. However, I still got myself up the day after for training and work, continuing my new training routine (the only thing I think is actually keeping me going). However, I wasn't great that Sunday, I was quiet at work and disinterested constantly thinking about Rosie. But I always knew that I would have bad days and it just made me more aware that my grief will continue to hit me in waves whenever it so chooses throughout my life. This is just something I have to adapt myself to be able to cope with and when grief does hit me I need to remind myself again the reasons I am doing what I am doing. To quote my previous blog, 'Remember what you're fighting for'. On the Sunday night after my shift, the day after my meltdown, I received an old picture from my sister of Rosie and I as children. This picture shows the love Rosie and I shared and captures the close sisterly bond we formed from a young age. This has since been an image I cherish an unbelievable amount. I don't know to what extent I explained mine and Rosie's relationship on here, but she always was more than a niece to me. With no exaggeration Rose made my childhood what it was. I was only three when Rosie was born and my sister lived down the road from me. I would spend a lot of my time there so Rose became more like my younger sister (even though that title still doesn't do justice what she really meant to me). She was my best friend and we were inseparable. Of course we could play like angels but like any sibling relationship we could fight like devils too but that made us closer. My sister, Emma, had Rosie at a young age and for the first part of Rosie's life was a single mum. Through this time I grew extremely close to both Emma and Rose and I know that through Rosie's death mine and Emma's bond has also been strengthened. I could say so much more about Rosie and I, the fun and laughter we shared but I believe this picture shows it all. In fact if you look at the picture of Rosie and I as children compared to the picture of Rosie and I at her 18th birthday the love is still evident despite the years that have passed. Rosie was never and will never be 'just' a niece to me. I was protective over her like a mother, played and shared secrets with her like a sister, and loved her fiercely as an aunt, best friend and sister.  

Rosie and I as children

Rosie and I at Rose's 18th 2012

      

 On a lighter note I made a funny discovery when changing after a gym session last week. I realised on Monday (20th) I had put my pants on inside out three times in a week. I had obviously done this in the dark when getting ready for the gym in the early hours but it made me laugh out loud when I discovered this. Much like my cramp scene that I explained in my last blog, I began laughing to myself with other people present. However, again, if I can laugh at the little things like that then I'm in the right sport as I'm sure it won't be the last time I make the foolish mistake. In fact many people who I told suggested its a sign of good luck and they're my super hero pants. Another error I regularly make is forgetting my towel meaning I have to drip dry and do star jumps to try and dry myself. Having to be so organised for my early training starts are affecting my ability to dress and dry properly. I would love to think I'll get more organised with time but a zebra never loses his stripes :).

 

 The other thing that happened that week on Wednesday the 22nd was my 23rd birthday. On the Tuesday I had a day off (hooray) and decided to make my birthday cake. As well as that I was scheduled for a long run, spin and swim. Once my red velvet birthday cake was made I went off on a 1h30 run which was my longest run since I began getting physio and again had no pain. After a little rest and some dinner it was off to spinning. I always enjoy a tough spin class and this didn't disappoint and although I was tired as per usual after this intense day I was looking forward to swimming. When I got onto the poolside I saw a breaststroke swimmer in the fast lane (cue another rant). As opposed to getting out she insisted in staying there and just stopped as soon as I caught up with her, which without sounding cocky was pretty often. When I got to my main set there was the bloke from last week who also loves to do some breaststroke so I was equally frustrated when I saw him get in 'my' lane. However, I was determined to do well on my main set which was again 8x200m. When at a technique swim session on the Friday before I discovered my hand had been entering the water wrong (thumb first). I don't know when I started doing this but it meant I had been habitually doing my arm stroke for front crawl wrong for years. I should have been entering the water with a flat hand and in effect spearing the water with the tips of all my fingers. After lots of slow and concentrated drills to rectify this on Friday I decided to try my new simple stroke change on the Tuesday. As the aim of the set is to get each 200m (8 lengths) quicker I decided to take it easy focussing on my stroke - reaching out, spearing the water and pull through under water. I recorded my 200m at 3m21 which I was overwhelmed at when you consider my best just a week before was 3m35. That's almost 15 seconds off my time in just a week with a tiny stroke adjustment and I wasn't pushing the pace at all. I was so pleased! I later worked out (well someone else worked it out) that that is 4 minutes off an Ironman distance swim - amazing! I got out of the pool an hour later in a great mood.

 The day after my euphoric swim improvement it was my birthday. I wanted to keep myself busy during the day as knew I would find it tough thinking of Rose not being there. As I was getting ready for work I played 'i giorni' by Ludovico Einaudi. Ryan, Rosie's boyfriend, played this on the piano at her funeral. I have struggled to listen to it since that day and have had to walk out of the room if Ryan began to play it. I wasn't trying to purposely make myself upset I just really wanted to listen to it to reflect and think about Rose. I'll admit I did get really upset when I first put it on but then I closed my eyes whilst in the shower and thought about all the things Rose and I did together. It is truly amazing how much emotion, memory and calm one song can provoke. It was a special moment reflecting on Rosie's life on my birthday. I did get a sense of unfairness when I thought about us being in CentreParcs with the whole family at the same time last year but it was a nice quiet moment which I continued when driving to work. It is a truly beautiful song. The day went relatively quickly, I got a big cheer when I walked into work and opened some cards and presents at work - I wanted something to cheer me up. I did start welling up when I saw the card from my nieces and nephew which had Rosie's name included but I ended up smiling over it. I had work the next day and wasn't fussed on drinking so I did what I love and went for a birthday swim with the Tri Club. This session was a 26 x 100m (4 lengths). I thoroughly enjoyed the session and really found the improvement in my stroke beneficial. In fact I have even debated with myself going upto the faster lane as I was constantly on the toes of the others in my lane and sometimes even left it half a length before I started to swim so I wasn't held up. Question is, is it better to be the fastest in the middle lane or the slowest in the fastest lane? However, upon finishing I found out I got a PB in an my half Ironman distance swim with 28m40. With that result I am on track for a sub hour Ironman swim! What could be better than a PB on your birthday? Furthermore, if I want to improve my stroke even more I know the man to talk to. There is a guy at the Tri Club who visits a someone at Canary Wharf to assess his stroke. He is one of the fastest swimmers at the club and said he saw him, slogged away at the drills he was given and went from an uncomfortable 57min IM swim to a comfortable 53minutes. So I have gone against what I said a few months back about the swim being the hardest to cut the time off as I have made it evident within one week that is rubbish!

 With my new coach and determination to listen and improve I should be cutting my times off all over the place, there is no room for marginal gains I need big ones!

My homemade birthday cake of course with a little bit of Rose there too

 

 

Remember what you're fighting for

  Well I started this week with my new coached training plan by Mark Kleanthous. He somehow managed to understand my shift pattern straight away and worked a fortnights plan for me around my 12 hour shifts. I was working the early shift this week 7am-7pm with only one day off on Wednesday as I was doing overtime. My first session on Monday included a run during lunch and then a tough Wattbike session after work. I knew that as the explanation of this session almost filled an A4 page it was going to be hard. I had my Jackoatbar for a much needed energy boost for my session and got on with it. I was not wrong - I may have only been on there for half an hour but I'm sure it was the hardest 30 minute session I have ever done and by the end I looked like I had jumped in a swimming pool fully clothed! There was 10 minute cool down either side of my main set which was 20minutes, yet just in the in main set I exceeded my PB distance on the Wattbike - this just proves what a well planned session can do. I also wrote down all my results such as my RPM, Cadence, Distance, Wattage and Heartrate for Mark to be able to work his magic and also to use as benchmarks to track my future progress. 

 On Tuesday I did a 45 minute treadmill run with, wait for it...with NO PAIN! This was probably the first long run I had done for over a month and a true sign that my physio work really is making a huge improvement. After work I went spinning and then had a swim session planned. During spinning I began to feel a little bit of cramp in my left calf - during a sprint it actually stopped me however I stretched it out and carried on. By the end of spinning I was exhausted but knew I could not deviate from my plan. So I went swimming. As soon as I got in the pool my left calf through to my foot was cramping - I had to try and get to the end of the pool by what can only be described as single arm doggy paddle while with my other hand I gripped my foot in pain. Again, after some massaging and stretching it had gone away and I got on with my main set. This was 7 x 200m (8 lengths) sets with the aim to get faster each time. My best that day was 3m35 - averaging 26secs per length and in the middle had a slump of 3m40 (but on that set I was held up by others in the lane who were doing breast stroke - I mean COME ON - you do not do that in the fast lane of a pool, rant over). When I finished my session I was pleased I had completed a structured swim session on my own. Normally I just slog out 100 lengths (sometimes more) and then get out - monotenous and boring and also questionable as to what good and improvement I actually gain. So I had completed my session and it was time to get out. Only problem was when I tried to jump out a crippling cramp shot all through my left leg and forced me back in the pool. I embarrasingly attempted to get out of the pool at least 10 times but each time was forced back in. I have no idea what I must've looked like to the lifeguard and few swimmers left but I can imagine it looked like something a 'Chuckle Brothers' sketch; "To me - to you" = "In - out, In - out". I did eventually manage to haul myself out the pool and limped towards the changing rooms feeling somewhat bashful, but also laughing at the scene I just created. If these little moments make me smile then I suppose I'm in the right sport. When I got home I wrote some more notes on my plan, again writing down my heartrate during spinning, my pace when running, speed of my swim sets and questioning why I got cramp. Was it a lack of nutrition? I had only consumed 1850 calories that day with a estimated calorie loss of 900 (this estimation is not generous). However, after speaking to Jane, a cycle and swim coach and my cycle buddy, during a 2 hour turbo session the following day (we decided to stay inside as the weather has made the roads awful and hitting a pothole now could mess my season up completely) she assured me that nutrition plays no part. The explanation that a lack of salt and water causes cramp is in fact a myth - those reasons were 'discovered' years ago where scientists found during an experiment that people who sweat more tend to get more cramp. They took this that as you sweat water and salt that is what you lack and causes cramp. However, since then there have been numerous experiments that show no correlation to this being true. In fact, the most realistic and somewhat simple explanation as to why we get cramp is in fact an increase in exercise as the lactic acid builds up. This would make sense in my case as I have begun running again after a long period of time. Since then I have also received some interesting information from Mark regarding cramp and restoring lost electrolytes from sports drinks and tablets. I also just want to point out here that I know my nutrition is not up to an athlete's calories comsumption based on my output however my plan is to continue as I am so I am able to lose more weight and get down to my ideal race weight of 10stone.

 Anyway, despite my issue of getting out of the pool I enjoyed my session and had made it aware to Mark that I will have to do more sessions like this alone as opposed to rely on the Tri Club for my tough speed base sessions. When we move to Marlow I will be that much further from the swim training in Chesham. It would be an hours commute in total (excluding all the chit chat after) which is vital time I could be training or sleeping. With that in mind I will not be cutting it out completely, I aim to get there at least once a week as Mark agrees it is beneficial to train in a group as well and moreover, I enjoy meeting my Chiltern Tri friends and chatting about all things triathlon - something I cannot do with everyone else in my life, I suppose it's like my triathlon counselling. I kept my training form up all week, following my plan religiously and fitting my training in around my 12 hour shifts - even if that did mean getting up at 4am on some occasions. On the note of getting up at 4am I have to share this video which has humoured me immensely over the last week. I may be taking the complete piss out of myself by laughing at it but I honestly have not laughed so much in a long time. I have also been told by my work friends I am like the person in the cartoon. All you other Ironman's will enjoy this too! 

I'm training for an Ironman

 I also have to use this opportunity to share this other video I have come across this week. A Twitter friend, Sophie Radcliffe, who also completed Wales last year shared a video. The first time I watched it I got goosebumps and then the second time I listened more intently and got emotional. This video really impacted on me and as corny as it sounds it was like it was referring to me. I began taking quotes from it which struck a chord with me and couldn't stop listening to it. Each time it had the same affect on me. It really envoked a fire in me. At first I picked out the quote which referred to waking up for training;

"6am and your hand can’t make it to the alarm clock before the voices in your head start telling you that it’s too early, too dark, and too cold to get out of a bed.
Aching muscles lie still in rebellion, pretending not to hear your brain commanding them to move
A legion of voices are shouting their unanimous permission for you to hit the snooze button and go back to dreamland, but you didn’t ask their opinion.
The voice you’ve chosen to listen to is one of defiance.
A voice that’s says there was a reason you set that alarm in the first place. So sit up, put your feet on the floor, and don’t look back because we’ve got work to do

For what is each day but a series of conflicts between the right way and the easy way"

 Then as I began to listen to it more I began to get it. I have been feeling increadibly daunted by the challenge I have set and increasingly worried I cannot achieve it. I'm scared of the competition and afraid of letting everyone down. All I want to do, more than anything is make Rosie proud. She is the soul reason I set out on this mission. Her passing made me want what I have always dreamed of. Crossing that line in Kona, even imagining it makes me get emotional - the journey I would've taken to get there cannot be expressed in words. I want and need it for me and I want to get there for Rose. This quote from the video touches all of these points and makes me well up every single time; (I''ve highlighted the last sentence as that is truly what the essence of this video means to me and what I need to remind myself of when things will inevitably hurt and get tougher)

"You’re in a fight against an opponent you can’t see
Oh but you can feel him on your heels can’t you?
Feel him breathing down your neck
You know what that is?
That’s you…
Your fears, your doubts and insecurities all lined up like a firing squad ready to shoot you out of the sky
But don’t lose heart
While they aren’t easily defeated, they are far from invincible
The Battle Royale between you and your mind, your body and the devil on your shoulder who’s telling you that this is just a game, this is just a waste of time, your opponents are stronger than you.
Drown out the voice of uncertainty with the sound of your own heartbeat
Burn away your self doubt with the fire that’s beneath you
REMEMBER WHAT YOU'RE FIGHTING FOR"

 The only time I deviated from my training plan this week was instead of doing an easy 45 minute run I did a tough interval session with these words as my motivation. I listened to the video over and over (around 15 times) and everytime the heavy breathing comes in (when you watch it you'll know what I'm talking about) I sped up and by the end of the video I was at a full sprint imagining myself sprinting across the line in Kona;

"And when your time comes and a thousand different voices are trying to tell you
that you’re not ready for it,
listen instead to that lone voice of descent,
that one voice that says:
“you are ready”
“you are prepared”.
It’s all up to you now!“

 I repeated these sets 15 times and for the first time ever I loved a treadmill session. I tried to express what this video meant to me to Sophie who shared it but if you didn't know then I'm sure it is pretty evident what it means to me now and cannot thank you enough for sharing it. I now listen to it every morning, so when those 4am starts get tough I have this to spur me on and remind myself of the reason I set the alarm and remember what I'm fighting for! By Wales, maybe even Lanzarote, I hope to be able to recite this so I can turn to it when I need it most. So now I'll stop talking about it and please, I urge you all to actually watch it!

Rise and Shine - Welcome to the Grind

 Despite the improvement on my knee I have decided to cut my Devon Coastal marathon on the 8th of February to a half marathon. My mum, physio and Jane agree that there is no point damaging myself when I have come so far. As much as I would love to add another marathon medal to my collection I have to stop being stubborn and understand that causing further pain to my knee could detriment my long term goal. My mum keeps reminding me that I have completed 4 marathons now and have nothing to prove to anyone by doing another. A half marathon however, will be a good way of assessing how my knee and running fitness really is. It will still be a lovely weekend in Devon with my parents and Dan even if the weather and terrain of sand, rocks and narrow coastal paths make the event even more of a challenge.

 So I have got my longest (13.5hrs) and most definitely hardest training week under my belt whilst doing my fullest week of work. Furthermore, I have also lost 4lbs since the beginning of the week. More importantly though I have got my motivation and belief (thanks to the video) and diet back on track. To top the good week I have had I also had some lovely messages from people on Twitter - this support is what keeps me going. Included in these messages I had a lovely offer. One messaged me recently explaining he was not normally a blog reader but my story had really touched him and enjoyed reading mine. We exchanged a few messages and on Friday he asked whether I had a TT (Time Trial) bike. For those who do not know the most notable difference between a TT bike and a road bike is the use of aerobars/tri bars. This is where the rider rests their forearms over the handlebars to get a more aerodynamic low tuck position therefore making them faster (well thats the idea anyway). There will also be other aerodynamic differences such the frames composite. Anyway, I explained that I did not have a TT bike as due to the hilly landscape of my chosen Ironman events a TT bike would not be beneficial, even if they are sexy looking bikes and would love to own one. However, as Kona is flat and I would benefit from one he kindly offered to lend me his Specialized Shiv Pro TT (a bloody nice bike) when I make it to Kona - of course I would also have to learn how to ride a TT bike first!). Below is a picture of it - I'm sure you'll agree I'll may well be the envy of some bike porn with that, even at the World Championships!. I wasn't quite sure how to respond except for thank him for his unbelievable kindness. 

 On a further note, I have got even closer to my fundraising target of £1000 for SUDEP Action so much so I decided to increase my target to £1500. I always personally thank the people who sponsor me and thanked an old school friend who donated. We got chatting and she informed me she was aiming to do a half Ironman in September! It's great that we have a sport in common and so nice to catch up with an old friend. Also I just want to add that I don't want the increase in my fundraising target to seem greedy but I believe I can raise that and if I am able to raise more for such an important cause which is so close to my heart then it's worth it. There really are some lovely people in the world - thank you for the support on Twitter and to all who have sponsored me.

 Now, unsuprisingly I'm off for a run - I'll update again soon!

       

A new coach and a good start to 2014

I thought I would start this blog with a list of my booked events in 2014. I got this idea from another person's blog and thought it would be useful to some. It'll be a great help for me and probably my family and furthermore would be great to know if any Pirates or Twitter friends will be there too.


February 

8th - South Devon Marathonhttp://www.endurancelife.com/

23rd - Charlton Duathlonhttp://trytri.co.uk/

March

2nd - Reading half marathonhttp://www.readinghalfmarathon.com/

6-13th - La Santa Lanzarote traininghttp://www.clublasanta.co.uk/

April

6th - a2c Sprint Triathlonhttp://trytri.co.uk/

May

5th - Milton Keynes Marathonhttp://mkmarathon.com/

17th - Ironman Lanzarote (Lanzarote 11th-22nd)http://eu.ironman.com/triathlon/events/emea/ironman/lanzarote.aspx#axzz2qCQllZor

June

15th - Ironman 70.3 Wimbleball (sold out)

July

27th - Outlaw (sold out)

August

9-16th - Channel Swim slot

September

14th - Ironman Wales (sold out)

28th - Ealing half marathonhttp://www.ealinghalfmarathon.com/

October

11th - KONA?

 This list may be added to throughout the year but I hope to see some of you there and if anyone is around to shout support at me let me know! Also some of you may be wondering why I am doing a half marathon 2 weeks after Ironman Wales. Well, I have heard many people at work say they want to start running or complete a marathon or half marathon throughout 2013. So I decided to set up a work half marathon whereby many can achieve their goal. I always think the best way to achieve something is to book it so you HAVE to train for it. So that is why I am doing it and who knows as I should be in the peak of my fitness maybe I'll even get a PB?

 On the topic of events and training I recently found some statistics that outlines the average amount of training an Age Group qualifier does;

• Swimming miles per week; 7
• Biking miles per week; 232
• Running miles per week; 48

 With this in mind I need to do more. I know this is generic and not personalised but as a guide it is a good inclination as to how much I should be doing. After having no contact with Rick Kiddle to follow up my coaching wishes and as the time is ticking I have decided to get another in Mark Kleanthous. Mark has been an inspiration of mine for a long time. In fact I remember when I first got into triathlon I bought a book, The 'Complete Book of Triathlon Training' which he had written. Mark has also achieved much during his own triathlon and Ironman career. He has completed two double Ironman distance races and a triple Ironman in under 46 hours. Furthermore he has completed 36 Ironman's and 71 marathons. So as my best friend Ele said when she saw he had commented on my blog, "He's kind of a big deal". This comment is on my 'Reflections and Resolutions' blog whereby he wrote, "Hollie this was a truly inspirational read. Wishing you all the very best in 2014 & your journey to Kona. See you at the races!". If his credentials aren't enough to want him as my coach then his interest in my story is another reason. Hopefully his excitement and want to help me succeed will lead to a great patnership.

Mark Kleanthous

 In other news there has been an exciting new development on the house front. After a rather heavy night on Wednesday (8th) where I had my best friend and her boyfriend over to stay I got a call about a house in Marlow that had fallen through twice and would be perfect for us. So I managed to drag my guests out of bed and rushed to Marlow, even if they were in a somewhat hungover state. It did not take long at all to know that the house was beautiful and truly was perfect. I asked Dan when we walked in, "How many seconds do they say it is for you to know you want a house" to which Dan replied, "10 I think", I quickly retorted "Make that 2". After a stressful 2 days we got the house and I cannot be happier. Moving to Marlow offers so much more in the way of shops and lifestyle and I can already see many runs along the River Thames which I could run to in 2 minutes from our front door. Fingers crossed everything goes through - but what a great start to 2014!

 On Friday and Saturday I travelled home to take my nieces out for their birthdays. I took Amber, 14, to see 'Frozen' at the cinema, followed by a treat meal of KFC (it'll be the last of the year promise!). On Saturday I took Phoebe, 6, for lunch at Pizza Hut and then treated her to a Pug teddy at The Bear Factory. I came out of there with a very damaged bank balance, I just cannot resist her beautiful smile - she has truly got me wrapped around her little finger. It was lovely to spend the time with my nieces and will continue to do this for all of my brother and sisters children for their birthdays.
 As well as seeing my family I also met my sisters new addition to the family - my Pug Larry's brother from another mother, Nando (named after Rosie's love of the restaurant). I am seriously broody for another Pug now! He is however, great fun and a comforting addition to my sister and the family. 

Phoebe got camera shy (the dressed up pug isn't)

Larry and Nando

 Well I'm all up to date now. So Monday starts a new week and a new shift, the earlies 0700-1900. I have a Wattbike, run and strength/weight sessions planned. Catch up soon! 
        

 

Becoming 'normal' again

 Firstly I want to start with something I forgot to include in my previous blog which reflected on 2013. I want to say thank you to everyone who helped me in such a tough year. I have gained friends and support on Twitter, have become much closer to old friends and have also drifted apart from others. It seems sad that a tragedy can provoke such a loss but on the flip side of that it makes you realise who your true friends are. This is something that my sister and teenage niece, Amber have discovered too. Amber may only be 14 but she has such a mature head on her. Furthermore, what Rosie was great at is being a good judge of character and even after her death she has proved who can be relied on in such difficult times. Ele, who I have known nearly my whole life, has been wonderful and I know after seeing her the other day I can talk to her about all of my feelings. So although I have been feeling lonely I know that if I just have a few great friends I'll never be lonely again.
 On the subject of friends I was suprisingly invited to an old school friends party. I hadn't seen many of the girls attending for over 4 years and although was very friendly with them all at school wasn't as close to them now as others were. I had bumped into one friend recently when in Andover where I said what had happened to Rose. After feeling low and quite lonely after Rosie's death I really appreciated being invited. I did find out a few days after accepting my invitation that a girl who I had fallen out with would be going - this may sound childish (I am still young really) it did worry me as I didn't want any drama or problems. At one point I thought I should not go as she was closer to them but after much deliberation and with some advice from my mum I decided to go nonetheless. The conclusion was, life is too short, something I am so aware of now. Rosie knew all about my feelings towards this girl and how much hurt she had caused me those years ago and it would of been Rose I turned to for help. So when I heard 'Somewhere Over the Rainbow' come on when I was driving (this song was played at Rose's funeral) it made me think I had made the right decision by going.
 Going to the party was lovely. I caught up with old friends and found out who was doing what. Although 4 years isn't a lot in comparison to many reunions these 4 years included leaving school, going to university and onto the big wide world of job hunting. Everyone had heard of my Ironman achievements, in fact the girl who I had fallen out with was in fact scared of coming because I was an Ironman now and lifted weights! I may be an Ironman but I still have a heart that could cause no harm. The night was great, although I did struggle when we went out to Andover. The last time I was in that club was for Rosie's 18th birthday celebrations and I couldn't shake that. I kept staring at the chairs we sat at and how much fun that night was. If there ever was a movie flashback moment in my head it was then. My friends were being really kind - although I began to get teary and was standing watching rather than dancing I was never left alone. This is a true testament to the people I was with. Thank you all for understanding. I then decided to just drink through it to try and perk myself up (Rose would've done the same) and a few double vodkas later I was up dancing. Despite getting a guy kicked out as he tried to spike me it was a good night which rekindled friendships.
 

A few of the girls whilst out in Andover

 So what else has happened. Well New Years was nothing special as I worked and furthermore I had signed upto 'Poppyfields Equator Challenge'. This is a charity event organised by a Twitter friend I recently met who completed the Outlaw in 2013 whilst wearing a morph suit - just incredible. He did this to raise money for his niece, Poppy, who was diagnosed with a brain tumour at 14 months and after 4 brain operations, chemotherapy and radiotherapy is about to celebrate her 11th birthday. The aim of this challenge is to exercise everyday and track your mileage. Everyone who is involved pays a £5 entry fee and for everyday you miss you pay a £1 fine. The idea is to collect everyones mileage and the aim is to 'go around the world' and get to the equator and back. So this was yet another way for me to boost myself to get the miles in as well as help someone else's niece, a relationship that is so special to me.So on the 1st of Januray I went on the Wattbike to track my mileage. When I was at work I continued this pattern and after 4 sessions I was finally almost back to the speed and efficiency I was a month after the Ironman. So muscle memory does exist! I hope to exceed this fitness in the not too distant future.

My Wattbike achievements

 Furthermore, this breakthrough in fitness was powered by my new sponsors and nutrition brand Jackoatbar. I had been contacted by them on Twitter a few days before asking whether I would like to be a brand ambassador for them which I of course happily agreed to. Furthermore, the founder took the time to send me a long email explaining in detail what nutrition to take on the lead up to an Ironman but most importantly during an Ironman. This information is invaluable as although I used gels in Wales I am no expert and just took them when I felt necessary just to get me to the finish. Now that my goal is higher my nutrition and training needs to get more serious so this advice was great. So thank you Brett from Jackoatbar. Also it's handy that the bars are bloody tasty! Some sport nutrition bars can taste foul but these flapjacks with varying flavours are delicious and a guilt free treat when training. My next delivery is in February and I can't wait! I look forward to working with you Jackoatbar!http://www.jackoatbar.com/
 

Yummy Jackoatbars to fuel me getting to Kona

 On my day off on Thursday (2nd Jan) I made it a busy one. I had my hair highlighted and again put the pink back in my hair in memory of Rose (a shameful selfie is shown). After that I went to a physio session where I hobbled out after feeling like I had been beaten up for half and hour. I then finished the day off with a 400m time trial and a swim bleep test. I didn't set any groundbreaking records that night but was pleased I went as it set me a benchmark. My 6m32 is no 400m PB, far from it, but I got held up in the lane and the outdoor pool (where I was proudly one of the few without a wetsuit) is slightly longer than the standard 25m. Also, my bleep test result of 26secs is nothing to shout about - but again I know I can improve (in fact I still think I could've pushed it more on the night). However, I am pleased I went and it kickstarted swimming in 2014. Getting back into my routine seems to be the only thing that makes me feel 'normal' again. There have been moments at work where I felt emotionally exhausted and needed time but it's now I realise that keeping myself busy training keeps me motivated and happier. Of course I always think of Rose and constantly feel my loss and will continue to have bad moments as the pain of losing Rose comes in waves. Sometimes I will just crash and I and everyone in my life need to know that. Normally I have a bad moment when driving alone, this is probably because that has always been the place I think the most and make most of my decisions. However, I am managing to control this, so even if I do let everything out when driving to work I put my 'face on' (sometimes I do actually put a new face of makeup on) and then become loud, chirpy and happy Hollie when walking into work. 

My shameful selfie with my new pink hair

 On a more positive note I am so excited for Lanzarote training with my Dad in March. Not only because I cannot wait to get away from this miserable British weather and get some sun but also to get me on track and moreover to spend some quality time with my Dad. I have also begun the process of getting my custom made trisuit designed - what is for definite is you will not miss me, so watch this space!
 So the routine is back and I'm slowly becoming the 'normal' me again - an albeit different me after such a tragedy but a somewhat happier me. I hope 2014 is my year.